Archive for the Uncategorized Category

Arise O Lord, and Judge Thy Cause

Posted in Uncategorized on October 4, 2017 by Country Preacher

Not everything that is published here is written by me. Some things get sent to me by others. The following is in response to the recent Seminary/Seward conspiracy to introduce pro-evolution propaganda into the church. (Or, “Satan’s attempt to drag souls to hell.”) Now, I’m not saying this is the most gentle way to address the problem. But gentle efforts have not worked. As I understand it, the district this came from actually inquired about the teaching at Seward, and was lied to. They also had their DP do a collegial visit to the seminary, where he was assured that no false interpretation of scripture was allowed. And yet, evolution is being taught at Seward, and it is being promoted at the seminary in Saint Louis. These are not trifling matters. Souls will be destroyed if this damnable heresy is allowed to continue.

Last evening, over some beverages of a Lutheran nature, the following award was presented. Sadly, the camera had trouble with the zoon feature, so it’s not possible to see the faces of these people. Totally unintentionally, I am sure. But, having received this from the internet earlier today, I present it here for your perusal. Does it go too far? Teaching people false doctrine is serious. Damnable in fact. And this seems to me a way to point that out to others. A brutal way, it is true. But the real brutality is the false doctrine being taught. I think this pales in comparison.

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Ministry of Silly Walks

Posted in Uncategorized on May 6, 2016 by Country Preacher

What to say of this?

Nadab and Abihu were consumed by fire for using the wrong candle. These people are simply not to be taken seriously regarding what it means to come into the presence of the living God.

Perhaps the reason they are shouting so much, and making strange guttural grunting noises, is that they fear God will not hear their prayers. Perhaps they are afraid he is sleeping, or on a journey, or covering his feet.

That does happen with gods sometimes. But not the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. Not the God whose son was put to death for sins. He even died for sins like this video, although I have to trust the Word of God on that one, because I can’t see anything redeeming this abomination.


Embarrassing is only the beginning

Posted in Uncategorized on April 21, 2016 by Country Preacher

The church in the west is facing its first large-scale persecution since the time of Cyprian. We need serious leadership in these latter days. Men who hear the Word of God and keep it. Men who are able to exhort, rebuke and encourage.

The men in this photo seem to think church is some sort of game:

Screen shot 2016-04-21 at 7.59.40 PM It would be sad enough if they were merely shepherds and bishops in the church. But they are actually training the shepherds and bishops. This is more than just embarrassing. This is shameful. What on earth are the poor and dying to think of the church? Are those who have had their livelihoods ruined by the powers and authorities of this dark realm to find comfort in such twaddle? Why would someone facing the loss of reputation at the hands of the politically correct left, merely for speaking obvious truths, think that the LCMS had anything to offer them?

Is this how we behave in the house of the Lord God Almighty? Nadab and Abihu were consumed by fire for less than this.

Shame on the men in this photo. Shame on every one of them.

Problem Solver

Posted in Uncategorized on April 20, 2016 by Country Preacher

Apparently, some people are concerned that I am posting anonymously. Perish the thought. I have nothing to hide. So, I uploaded my picture for the header.

Sadly, my computer skills do not match my earnest desire for transparency. It seems that the picture was too big, and all that is left after cropping is a portion of the picture. I’m sure my friends recognize me, but those who are unacquainted with me may still have trouble with that. Sorry. If I ever figure out how to post my whole face, then maybe this thorny problem can be solved.

If only there was a way to find out information on the interwebs.

Story Time

Posted in Uncategorized on November 24, 2015 by Country Preacher

Once upon time there was an Apostle. Let’s call him “Paul”. And Paul the Apostle saw that the church might not take the Good News of Jesus death and resurrection seriously. So,Paul (who, we must remember, was writing by inspiration of the Holy Ghost), wrote some things to make sure that people understood how important and valuable the Gospel was:

In the same way, the Lord commanded that those who proclaim the gospel should get their living by the gospel.

Let the one who is taught the word share all good things with the one who teaches. Do not be deceived: God is not mocked, for whatever one sows, that will he also reap.

Centuries later, when the church had been corrupted, another man, we’ll call him Martin Luther, was sent by God to reform the church. And, being faithful to the word, he collected some scripture passages in a little book, called a catechism. In this book was a “Table of Duties”, that outlined what different people were supposed to do. And he had both of those verses from Paul the Apostle in there, to let people know that pastors were supposed to be supported by the people they preach to. This meant that pastors would be expensive. But the people, eager to follow the command of our Lord, and with gratitude in their hearts for the Gospel, always remembered this, and followed the command very carefully.

Just kidding. The people decided that following the bible was hard. So they came up with a thing called “worker priests” that flatly contradicted what Paul says. Basically, you have a pastor, but don’t pay him enough to live on! Then, he earns his living somewhere else, so the church members can save some coin. And apparatchicks called district presidents loved it! Because part time pastors didn’t have enough time or energy to hold them accountable to be faithful.

The people also thought, “As long as we don’t call them pastors, we don’t have to train or pay them properly”. So they invented a category called “licensed lay minister”. And the apparatchicks really loved it! Because these men didn’t have the time, energy or the training to hold them accountable to be faithful.

Oh, the people were naughty. And the District Presidents, who should have known better, were naughtier.

But everyone lived happily ever after, because that’s how all fables end. I mean, it’s not like God threatened that those who mock him in this exact way will face judgment or anything…

Thinking out Loud: Of Bishops

Posted in Uncategorized on November 18, 2015 by Country Preacher

When the Blessed Reformer complained about the Roman bishops, saying that they were “worldly lords and princes, who will neither preach, nor teach, nor baptize, nor administer the Lord’s Supper, nor perform any work or office of the Church”, the context sure makes it seem like he did not intend us to finish the sentence with, “and therefore, if you would only remove men entirely from the pastoral office, put them in an office building, and make them beholden to bylaws, so they aren’t burdened by the challenges of the pastoral office, and can truly lead the church, then the problem would be solved.”

But, then, I’ve been wrong before. Maybe he did mean that. Once we solve our Augustana XIV problem, maybe we can look into fixing the Smalcald 3:10 one.

And David his Ten Thousands…

Posted in Uncategorized on November 6, 2015 by Country Preacher

There is truly nothing new under the son. Al Barry had the synod balloon (although, in his defense, there is some evidence this was thrust upon him). The Keischnick administration went all in from the starting bell with Ablaze!(tm). Apparently the current synod leadership has reached the “They did what?” phase of their administration. I give you: Nonsense word coffee coaster!


What does it mean? We’ll have to wait and see. Which is to say, it means nothing, because, and I can’t emphasize this enough, it’s NOT A WORD!!!!

Is it a confessional attempt to displace the Transforming Churches Network? Can’t be that, because the sort of people who like that won’t do something confessional anyway. Does it mean the Eucharist – the thing which feeds us, around which out life centers, and which draws us into the life of Christ and the communion of saints each Sunday morning? A quick check through the catechism would indicate that, although there are many names for the Lord’s Supper, Revitality is not among them. (In fact, every known term for the Lord’s Supper uses actual words.)

Whatever it means, this much is certain: The ad agency owes the synod a refund. Because, seriously?

Also, is that dark spot a water stain because it really is a coaster? Or is it a map of some country in Africa where we are moving our headquarters to be closer to the global center of Christianity, specifically the Lutheran Church? Only time will tell. Until then, all we have is the teaser coaster. And really, I think that’s enough.

No seriously. Stop now.